did i find him?

so there is this guy that is talking to me.. he so says that his girl broke up with him but i think he broke up with her to be with me.. but he talks to me like im a princess and he treats me good. we will see what happenss though on the other side im upset because my brother leaves tomorrow for iraq..

life..

Be creative be thoughtfull

Love your life .. make it like you wount have it tomorrow tell eveyone you love them as your last words bc you never know when you will see them last.. take advantage of your brothers and sisters cuz i never see my brothers ones in the army and ones never here hes on his own. have the best relationship with your mom and dad.. if not your grandparents show them respect. love your animals as much as possible sleep in your bed one night and then for 4 days sleep on the floor and eat once a day and only eat soup .. then the next day see how you feel.. do you feel sorry.. do you feel guilty. do you know there are people that sleep outside when it rains when it snows. how selfish are you. ride a bike walk.. quite using that car for everywhere you go. think about it.. for once.

death

so my uncle alferd died and my dog was put asleep yesterday, sometimes i just dont understand about how life goes. why death has to be apart of something..i mean.. we have enough people in the world.. why cant we just live at the age we are at.i mean i would have no problem living llike this the rest of my life. im 19! i dont know.. feeling this way ..it sucks..i hate it.. i do not know what to do to handle my tears and this pain that i am having...

New York/BRother.

I hope i don't fall in love with this city.

every year i go to a mission trip. one with my youth group/i love them dearly.

and also i did with my school, to build homes for people who lost everthing in katrina(mississippi)

we all need to think about how much we have.

we need to open our eyes, see what is infront of us.

i love reaching out to people.

so my brother comes home on the 3rd and i leave the 6th he leaves the 8th and then iraq down the road the 28th. but i only see him for those 2 days. cuz i go to college.. which upsets me bc that doesnt give me much time to be with him.

i love him to death. i hope he knows that

if i havnt said much about my love life yet lol.. i am dating a guy but sadly im going away to college so i don't kno how its gonna go..

even tho we aren't boyfriend and girlfriend it sure seems like one.

i miss him

i wish i get a job down there. bc of my brother im thinking about the rotc.. i don't know yet. i have thinking about it.

any imputs?

but anyways. talk to you in a week to tell you more about my trip in new york!

Is forgotten

no matter what i try to reach out.. no one understands i feel like im still in the same place where i was in when my friend randy died. im forgotten no one asks me how my day is any more. im always trying to help other peoples needs.


im just a dissappointment to everything/

The Future

I kno sometimes i may repeat my self but really. lol im so nervous about college more about meeting people..

this has nothing to do with what im talking about but i wanted to let u all kno that my dogs leg is broken and then her foot is smashed and we dont kno what to do .. should we put her to sleep for her?

im dating a guy.. new huh? lol hes nice just hopes this one stays with me for awhile.. but im afraid cuz im going to college. maybe i need to grow up and look at the whole picture..? but its hard to let someone go. even though u jus met them.

am i going to be able to handle this? life. in general. the summer is almost over my gosh it went fast.

in a week i go to ny.. im excited.. we are going to work with the homeless. this is my last year.. im sad. maybe ill get a wake up call.

life is pretty awsome i would never trade my close friends or family for anything..
my brother is going to iraq in a month.. im really worried. only for his safty im gonna miss him so much even tho he doesnt talk to me that much. its hard for me .. i never cry.. but when it comes to my brother. i get a teary eyed. ..

which reminds me.. i may go into the rotc if im tough enough lol.. i have no idea how i would do it.. im a fat butt lol.

just wish me luck.

and everything else
more to come..

random but info

i kknow no one really reads my blogso no matter what i put here itaint gonna matter. but anyways.. latly its been really easy ive been traveling everywhere. family and friends. this comin month im gonna be fixin to go to new york. HERE I COME i can not wait.most sweetest place! its been one of my dreams honestly i aint liein. but college is comin up right around the corner! i am so nervous. hmm im single that aint anything new.. but the weather has been hott.. so i haven'tbeen out bc i can't breath.. my heart hasbeen hurting me.. what if i died i wounder wher ei would go lol gosh i wish someone would read this i would right more interesting things if they did. i havent decided what i want to be yet. but when i took the act last i thought about how it would be sitting in a class room and learning something new. hmm..well ive learned alot of things being out of high school. that everything you want you have to work for. noo matter what it may be. and i found out men are crazy along the way lol. i went to camp this past week and thought about alot while i was there. things you wouldnt even imagin. Now im with my fam in poplar bluff. life is intersting